Manners demand is up.

Ignore this advice.. or not.. I didn't send it to you in an email, or write it to you directly.  

So, what is a relationship oriented person to do in a world of emails, and letters, and notes, and yes Facebook, Twitter and endless MEMEs valiantly striving for mindshare.  

Here are my suggestions. in no particular order...  

Use Manners.. always..  Friends and colleagues are precious assets in a world more and more devoid of true, caring, relationships.  Treat them as such. 
Be Honest.  Tell those you care about that you can or cannot do things.. Tell them what you think about their decisions. Applaud them and criticize them.. but above all love them.. Be grownups... Just because you said it, doesn't mean they care... or that anything will change. 

Consider that inaction is action.  If you are too busy, you can't just expect others to understand. We are ALL busy.  That is the way of things. Taking the time to call, check in, say thank you.. are all things that grown ups do.  Don't make excuses.  Make relationships... intentionally, and directly.  

Do more with less.  Take the time to care for those you care for.. and for the rest. Let them go. Releasing them and you frees you both from an unwarranted "burden" of communication. 

Ditch the public humiliation commentary.  It is so tempting, but... Public Passive Aggressive communication is useless.  

Write what you care about. Share things that interest you. Talk to those you care about. Visit, Call,  and yes... write emails, letters and notes... All these things matter. Treat social media like a break room. Chat, comment, and question... openly, honestly, with sophistication and manners.  

Thus endeth my rant...  almost...

Generally, responding or commenting is totally up to you.. the whole channel runs on a market systems of likes, and comments to determine what you see.  The more you like and comment, the more you get out of it.  
BUT... If someone "writes on your wall, or posts on your wall".., or comments.  They stopped by.. your place. That is different.  and warrants attention.

Don't write long ones.  I have a pet peeve about people Not responding to emails... Like staring blankly into space when someone talks to you. For days... Says you don't matter, and I don't care what you asked about. It is rude and ugly on so many levels.

I respond to every email I get which makes any sort of request or asks for support. Sometimes, I agree to help, most times, I simply thank them for the information.   Regardless, I appreciate the time and effort that colleague or friend put into contacting me.  

Say Happy Birthday.. no excuses. If you care, you will do it. I've tried both ways, and I just can't justify not taking the time for those I care about. Now,  I probably care about fewer people... but that is likely a good thing. Real relationships are what matters. 

Thank you notes are NOT old school.  They are necessary.  Handwritten is best, but taking the time to write down a few personal thoughts is not a burden, it is a blessing. For the writer more than the recipient.   


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