Not missing people...

As I was driving to the office this morning.. It suddenly struck me that there are some people no longer in my life that I don't really miss. I know I write about how important it is to love one another, and that everyone is valuable.. That is true...
However....
I don't miss a lot of the people who have "done damage to me and/or my family".
I don't miss people who couldn't find value in my views and positions.
I don't miss people who choose to exclude others based on petty, nothing issues.

Translate that to.. maybe I never liked those people in the first place.

Now what do I do.. ?

Bible tells me to forgive them, and love them... Not just ignore them as I (and most of society) usually do...I can't argue with the idea, but "where the rubber meets the road" there is also a cutoff point... I like the idea of "judging" them and moving on much better.. it is more satisfying.. yet, it ultimately bring focus back around to what "I" want rather than what God wants... me me me me.. vs others others others....

No good answers or concise ideas here today.. just thinking out loud..

Would be nice to hear comments from someone...I wonder if anyone is reading this anymore.. either way, I will keep on keeping on..

Comments

CF said…
I'm reading and feeling pretty much the same.
I have just come to ONE very important realization..We throw the title "friend" around far to much. It has become like "love"... oh I love those shoes, or that ice cream, or your house...on and on.
Friend is a term that one must earn. Just walking through my life doesn't grant "friend" status. Some would say that Judas was at one time... a "friend."
People taht I am NOT missing include some that I really thought were "friends." In some cases, I know that I am still grieving their loss. Now, however, I realize that what I am grieving is my poor jugement because I thought I was a pretty good judge of people. Satan is really good at hiding inside of people and changing them. That is like a death. He uses them for his purpoes and somehow they allow it. The question is then, do I sometimes allow the same thing to happen? Sadly, I suppose I do.
Forgiving, and really meaning it is really hard work and more than I can do right now. So... I call out to God. Forgive me and help me to really forgive because I don't look forward to being judged by my standards.
Back to the "friend" concept. If I use Jesus as the role model for "friends." How many would lay down their life for me and how many would I do the same for?
I just lost a real true Godly FRIEND. We could talk about anything and did. We prayed together and praised together. You cried together, worried together. We studied scripture together and held each other accountable. We loved each other just the way we were but too much to allow us to stay that way. While I miss her very very much, I know that it was a "God Gift" that some folks never experience. Thank you Father for that gift.
Anonymous said…
I'm reading your stuff every day and really look forward to it. Everyone of us have people in their life that they don't miss anymore--I guess some of it is coming to the realization there wasn't really anything there to begin with...maybe it was just superficial or convenient to be "friendly" at the time. Forgiveness is one of the hardest things to do in this life and can never be truly done except with God's help especially when there is a lot of hurt involved--it will happen, though, and much is learned and lots of wisdom comes through all the pain. bp
Anonymous said…
I am left to wonder now if you miss me, Jeff. So I'm not very good at keeping in touch...
Scott said…
First, I miss you and your wonderful family. Second, there are appropriate boundaries that we place on our affections for people when they hurt us or change or something dramatic happens. More often than not, we just simply move on. For example, I don't think about my good friends my family grew up with very often. When I think of them, I wish them well and wonder how they are, but I don't really miss them. In fact, there are only a few people in my life I truly miss, even though many many people have been a great and important part of my life. Not sure where that falls on your scale but just thought I would throw my two cents worth in. Keep writing.

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